Getting Over Those Toxic Thoughts That’ll Drive You Crazy

My almost fifteen year old daughter, Paige, is now old enough to drive with a school permit to and from school since we live outside of town.

That thought doesn’t at all settle well with me.

When I was seventeen my family was involved in a horrible car accident that took my father’s life…sometimes my mind trails back to that blacktop road and that ugly scene that forever changed my little world…

Now that my oldest child is behind the wheel I’ve struggled. I have such an uneasy feeling at the idea of my girl driving to school without an adult in the vehicle (or anywhere for that matter once she gets her actual driver’s license.)

In fact Paige has technically been of age for the past year to use the school permit and I have yet to allow it to happen. My mama bear instinct just wants to jump in and take over. As she’s practiced driving with her dad and I she’s done well, but I just can’t seem to get over that large bump in the road of my messy mind — the one of her driving without us in the seat next to her.

So I’m working on my thought patterns and I’m in a new book by Jennie Allen titled, Get Out of Your Head. Jennie shares about her own struggles in life and writes about the idea of overcoming those thoughts that lead to a negative downward spiral.

I love the words from 2 Corinthians 10 verses 3 through 5 where Paul writes, “For though we live in the world, we do not wage as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

I have to truly live out taking every thought captive and making it obedient to Christ, especially the negative ones I have lately of my teenage daughter driving.

Jennie uses these verses of Paul’s in her book to magnify just how important, necessary, and doable it is ‘to destroy the lies that dominate our thought patterns.’

Remember I mentioned that I can’t get over Paige driving without an adult in the vehicle, that’s where my hang up happens…but the truth is she is so covered in security because Jesus is with her all the time…in or out of the car…and the bottom line is He’s by far a better protector than I can (or will) ever be.

That’s a thought I have to hold tightly to otherwise I’m setting myself up for failure and I’ll be darned if Paige nabs hold of my anxiety for herself.

This book of Jennie’s challenges me to ‘interrupt negative thought patterns’ by remembering ‘I have a choice.’

I have a choice.

I can choose to trust Jesus more than the obstacle. I can choose to believe He is perfectly in control. I can choose to love that His word navigates me along a trustworthy path…otherwise the most notable “driving log” is going to be the one where I drive myself and my family crazy.

Y’all I don’t know if you’re facing a struggle of some sort, if you’re trying to take matters in your own hands (or out of your daughter’s) but getting into scripture and reading Christian resources is absolutely hands down beneficial to our faith.

Click here to purchase a copy of Jennie’s book: Get Out of Your Head

I may not be quite ready to let Paige have a go on her own just yet but I’m getting closer and the more I ride alongside her the more I see her improving and I become more comfortable with the idea of her driving alone soon. It’s so ironically beautiful because it reminds me of the fact that the more time I spend in prayer, God’s word, and with fellow believers the more comfortable and closer I feel to Jesus. With out a doubt I know I’m on the right road even given the turns and bumps along the way because the truth is those obstacles give way for the opportunity of perseverance through Him. And though struggles are never much fun, we have the choice ultimately to let Jesus take the wheel (spiritually) over our fears or messes every time!!

Awe just look at her sweet face…she was appalled that I took that picture!❤️

Author: alimw2013

About For His Purpose~ My name is Alicia and I'm a thirty-something year old who loves Jesus. Only through God’s amazing grace and mercy I have been redeemed from past regret and shame. Reading His word has allowed me to look past Satan’s forceful lies, to see myself for who Christ says I am in Him. Through writing I have learned why I made the choices I made in my younger years and I now have a better understanding of why I desire to love God like crazy these days. Despite my daily failures, God remains faithful always. I am reassured of His unconditional love for me by every ink-drop spilled out on paper, each committed prayer as I cry out to Him, and deep understanding reflected through reading His word as truth. Yes keeping a blog will make me vulnerable to others’ opinions- there will be some who don’t understand, some who may criticize or judge, but on the other hand if just one piece expressed through my writing grabs someone’s attention and directs them to God, then pouring out my heart in a blog for the world to read is worth it. I choose to glorify Him alone through words streaming across a glowing screen. And it wouldn’t be fair if I didn’t reveal the fact that I’m incredibly quirky; I’m my loving husband’s best friend, my vivacious kids’ craziest cheerleader and spiritual trainer (3 John 1:4). I love anything farmhouse and rustic style. I think cupping a warm coffee mug in the palm of my hands is more satisfying than the contents within. I share a common obsession with my husband for the mountains, but I would (without a doubt) settle for waves crashing against my legs at the Atlantic Ocean just as well, and I almost always have a Yorkie curled up on my lap while writing. *All photos are photographed by forhispurpose.blog and therefore may not be stored or photocopied in any manner.

40 thoughts on “Getting Over Those Toxic Thoughts That’ll Drive You Crazy”

    1. Oh my!! Yes I need to keep in mind this is a normal process and part of growing up!!!
      Thank you so much for reading, commenting, and encouraging!!❤️ It was awesome to visit with you last Saturday, are you joining tomorrow?

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  2. Oh, Alicia. I raised three daughters. My 21 year old still doesn’t have her DL. I taught my girls to drive and I was like bacon-on-skillet. When my middle girl & I lived alone together, all we had was a bid Isuzu Trooper SUV. It was a tank & she was so small, even as a 16 year old. After teaching her to drive it, with wailing & nashing of teeth, it was time for her driver’s test. She was forced to use a mid-sized car for the exam. She flunked. She could drive a huge tank, but a smaller car, not so much. Then the 2nd attempt for the test came. She scored well. Two days later she says, “So, dad. Uh…..can I have the Trooper tonight?”. FEAR took over my body. It wasn’t long after that her great-gran bought her a Chevy Cavalier. I needed that sigh of relief at that time in our lives. I feel your pain. Jesus is in the backseat. God’s GRIP – Alan

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    1. Goodness Alan not sure if this made me feel any better!😅and why doesn’t the 21 year old have a driver’s License?? She’s terrified?!!?

      Ahhhh ya Paige has my depth perception…so not good!!! We live outside of town and there’s no shoulder on our road so I get nervous about her dropping off of the road…when it’s winter weather and slick out well I can’t even fathom that!!!
      I do honestly trust that I will overcome and I honestly feel better even after writing this post!

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  3. I am reading that book now as well! It has some great information. I can definitely understand your anxiety. And I am so sorry about your dad. That is tough. Only Jesus can help us move past that kind of fear. Praying for you and the whole situation! Thanks for the great tips on how to choose different thought patterns.

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  5. The picture is great, so tell Paige she doesn’t need to be appalled. 🙂 And this blog with your encouraging and wise words is great, as well. Letting go is certainly part of our children’s growth as well as our own, but it’s hard. One step and one day at a time, and you’ll look back and be amazed at the growth – yours and hers. Just like you said, it’s true of our walk with God, too. Navigating the obstacles brings about perseverance. God bless you with very calm nerves, my friend! 🙂

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  6. I can totally relate. My 15y/o now has her learner’s permit and is enrolled in driver’s ed. She was so excited to get her permit, it is exciting and I was fighting back tears.

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  7. I need to read that book! I added it to my cart so I don’t forget it.
    I will be going through this in a few years and I’m already freaking out about it. I’ll be keeping both your daughter and you in my prayers! ❤️

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  8. My parents wanted someone to run errands for them and couldn’t WAIT for us kids to get our driver’s licenses. I think I was more scared than they were. But my parents were third generation farmers and they both learned to drive as soon as they were tall enough to see above the steering wheel, so that’s probably why they weren’t worried.

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  9. Being a father of three grown daughters, I understand where you are coming from. You will know when the right time arrives for Paige to drive solo. God has given you and your husband the means to prepare her. God’s peace!

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  10. Our oldest is turning 14 very shortly so I know this is coming. I am dreading it 🙂 I mean, I am happy for the independence she will have and learn to use, but man oh man, am I having a nervous breakdown! That being said, I got my permit and license as soon as was possible so I guess I’m going to have to follow suit and let her go….gulp..praying for you! God Bless!

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    1. It seriously comforts me knowing these feeling must be normal…more so that we can discuss, relate, and encourage!!
      I’ll be praying over your concern as well!! We can’t let Satan mess with our minds!!! God is bigger!!

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  11. I don’t know why I’m not seeing your posts in my reader. I’m very behind on them apparently! Anyhow, I would be you and will be you in a couple of years. I have such a fear of my children driving, not because I don’t trust them but because I don’t trust other drivers. And oh my gosh…you mentioned the verse today that I’ve been trying to remember so I can say it to myself when I imagine the worse things that could be happening to me healthwise or the worse things that can happen in the world, etc. I am definitely looking up this book today because I need it! Thank you for sharing this, Alicia!

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    2. Oh that’s soooooo awesome that it was the verse you’ve been trying to think of!!! God is so awesome!

      How old is your son? The driving thing is definitely tough but I’m beginning to think “hey if we have our kids following the Lord we have the most important part of their life on the right track,” obviously they have to “own” it for themselves but all in all I guess I’m saying my concern of their faith should be more of a concern than anything, including this darn driving thing.

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  12. Awww mama. I am saddened by the trauma you faced losing your father too early in such manner. I hope that your daughter understands why you have been holding back. I am glad you’ve got the Word as an anchor in every storm. What can we do without the Bible and the revelation God shares through other believers!?! God has indeed given us all we need to overcome life’s challenges. Thank you for sharing.

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    1. Yup there’s just nothing that provides hope like His word of truth!!
      I think Paige does understand my concern but maybe not in a grace-filled way😏more like a “move on mom” attitude..I get that she’s that age though so she’s excited to drive.

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  13. Always love to see your smiling face, Ali! Such a great post. It’s also great that you are a protective mana, but yep you gotta give them room to grow and spending more time with God is the way to go. There you go, wrote a little poetry for you! 😃 ❤ Love you mini me. 😃

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  14. I’ve never heard of a school permit before. They let them drive without going through driver’s ed??? Sorry, but I lived for years a mile from the large local highschool. I was told that the police were called for an accident pretty much every day. I believe all that controlling your fearful thoughts and all, but God gives us the wisdom to know if our children are really ready for such things, and He expects us to use it.
    That being said, I think my 3 oldest had their licenses before they were 17, but they also had jobs to pay for their car insurance and gas. My younger two are 17 and 19 and still don’t have their license.

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    1. Yeah Paige doesn’t have to do drivers Ed if she doesn’t want to, she is however to complete 50 hours of driving within three months but it’s taking us forever to get there and we definitely will not allow her to use the school permit or get her drivers license until we feel confident that she is ready!!

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