The Cone of Shame

I feel like our dogs end up at the vet every other month. If it’s not for a routine check, we’re there because Eli’s seizures are flaring up or he’s not feeling up to par. The other day though it was my daughter’s dog, Macs (a little three-pound Yorkie who self-identifies as a pit bull). To keep this post rated ‘E for EVERYONE’ I won’t go into a detailed description of his medical issue, but I will tell you his back half was suffering irritably so without delay I loaded him up and took him in. Turns out he’ll be fine; doc fixed him up and sent him home with two different types of meds….and since he’s a chewer and a licker he also got a free prize!!!….a plastic necklace AKA the cone of shame….


60109B14-CCE2-4268-A80F-AB6C193D2697The poor little guy looks pathetic trying to tote along this protruding piece of plastic (that’s half his size). When he walks, he now has a waddle and his head bobs from side to side, almost resembling a swagger-type strut; but his face and eyes droop, revealing a true depressive temperament. (I wish I could attach a video to give you a good laugh but apparently I’d have to upgrade my WordPress account so just imagine Ace Ventura’s awkward stride and you’ll have a good idea!) And to top it off it’s been snowing a lot here, so when Macs goes out for potty breaks you can imagine the “snow-cone” humor from my kids.

I feel bad for him, but in a canny sense I’m reminded of the many times I’ve mentally and emotionally worn my own cone of shame for a lengthy period of time…when I’ve caught myself nagging at my husband over petty things, harping on my kids when really I’m the one in need of an attitude check, or when I allow the lies that I’m ugly (because of my past) to fester…the list goes on and Satan quickly steps in and says, “here my pet, you’ve messed up again, let me firmly place this cone of shame around your neck—keep your head down, don’t look around, just focus on your pity and the extra weight you carry, and most importantly medicate yourself with an extra dose of embarrassment and shameful thoughts and feelings. Now stay put!! And remember your key diagnosis is shame.”

…Here’s the beautiful thing though, “cones of shame” whether on a dog or on us (in a mental denotation of course) aren’t meant to be permanent!!

It’s in these moments of shame we must look at our state of condition with a new perspective. Even if our cone seems hopeless with a circumference the size of a pin needle, Jesus is right there and He can still work us through our situation when we seek Him for forgiveness. We can then see purpose beyond the shameful cone.

The truth and positive outlook regarding a cone of shame is this:

  • It’s a direct effect of the cause (in other words you can typically identify what caused the shame once you feel it, which means no guessing games, making it quicker to tackle and fix the problem)
  • Perhaps the most obvious, a cone of shame will force you to look forward (you have no other choice honestly)
  • It’s temporary (there is light at the end of the tunnel…or cone😉)
  • It’s purpose is to work towards strength and healing (even if it has to be a slow process)

We aren’t meant to remain in a cone of shame, our dog or ourselves! Shame just simply, but skillfully, serves a temporary purpose—to pinpoint or recognize the mess created, correct it, and get healed in the midst. And the quicker we allow Jesus to heal that shame the quicker we’re released from its grip. Such a beautiful reality…

Unfortunately some never look past the rim of the cone of shame, some feel stuck.

I’ve been there. Too many times to count.

But as I draw closer to my Master, I know and trust when the shame longs to define me, the One who graciously releases the cone of shame’s tension is right in view ready to free me of the burden.

Maybe you’re currently struggling over shame…but check out this promise of hope—if you’re reading this post, you’re looking beyond the cone of shame right now in this very moment and here is what God’s word says regarding your pain…

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

Psalm 103:8-12 The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.

Now remove that cone of shame and take a long refreshing drink from the One who offers an endless supply of living water and eternal life.

(Read John 4:1-42 The Woman at the Well for extra studying)

Author: alimw2013

About For His Purpose~ My name is Alicia and I'm a thirty-something year old who loves Jesus. Only through God’s amazing grace and mercy I have been redeemed from past regret and shame. Reading His word has allowed me to look past Satan’s forceful lies, to see myself for who Christ says I am in Him. Through writing I have learned why I made the choices I made in my younger years and I now have a better understanding of why I desire to love God like crazy these days. Despite my daily failures, God remains faithful always. I am reassured of His unconditional love for me by every ink-drop spilled out on paper, each committed prayer as I cry out to Him, and deep understanding reflected through reading His word as truth. Yes keeping a blog will make me vulnerable to others’ opinions- there will be some who don’t understand, some who may criticize or judge, but on the other hand if just one piece expressed through my writing grabs someone’s attention and directs them to God, then pouring out my heart in a blog for the world to read is worth it. I choose to glorify Him alone through words streaming across a glowing screen. And it wouldn’t be fair if I didn’t reveal the fact that I’m incredibly quirky; I’m my loving husband’s best friend, my vivacious kids’ craziest cheerleader and spiritual trainer (3 John 1:4). I love anything farmhouse and rustic style. I think cupping a warm coffee mug in the palm of my hands is more satisfying than the contents within. I share a common obsession with my husband for the mountains, but I would (without a doubt) settle for waves crashing against my legs at the Atlantic Ocean just as well, and I almost always have a Yorkie curled up on my lap while writing. *All photos are photographed by and therefore may not be stored or photocopied in any manner.

29 thoughts on “The Cone of Shame”

    1. Amen! I love Psalm 103, when I wrote this, the verse of ‘God removing our sins as far as the east from the west’ came to mind and then when I read through all the surrounding verses I was like YES!!!! Thanks for reading😉

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Ya I never thought much about that, but you’re right..I actually have wrote quite a few posts regarding my pets!! That’s such a great point!!….surely they’ll be in Heaven with us one day….😉❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Oh my goodness! I love this post and the great lesson it provides!! Confession, I’d love to share this on my blog (with your permission) but I don’t know how! Eek! If you don’t mind, p,ease let me know and I’ll research how to share! 🤦🏼‍♀️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you!! You should be able to go to the ending area of this particular post and then hit the reblog button and it will prompt and direct you from there! Thanks Cecilia…I always look forward to reading your posts as well but sometimes my phone doesn’t always notify me of new posts, it’s frustrating..ah well technology!!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m so confused about my last post. I’m feeling really insecure. It’s about Pride and Judging, and I thought that I was guilty of judging, but then I read a couple of posts about Judging, and I thought, wait a minute… I wasn’t condemning anyone. Maybe I wasn’t judging. Maybe I’m confused. I am so messed up, and insecure right now, that I don’t what I did that was right or wrong. And I am hoping that I make some sense, because I’m not sure that I do. Could you please read my post and tell me what you think. I’m feeling like I just made myself look like a horrible condemning and prideful person. Now I just feel insecure and totally confused.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Sorry about my comment there. I was experiencing some anxiety and confusion really bad. A bit of paranoia was in there too. Ugh.. It happens with my health stuff, but I feel bad because I didn’t even comment on your post! You’re post is great by the way. I’m always threatening to put a cone of shame on our cat. She’s been licking her fur off. When we looked into it we found that this can be caused by anxiety. Go figure. She takes after me. I’ve kind of wondered if she has been picking up our anxietios vibes when we aren’t doing so great.

    On a positive note we think some of her fur is coming back in. Andrew thinks maybe because he finally calmed down about our neighbor. Yeah, he wasn’t too crazy our neighbor but we talked (and I prayed a lot!) and he realized that he needed to calm things down. So, maybe… You never know what animals pick up on.

    That’s a comforting verse isn’t it…He is faithful…and to cleanse us…. Glad that it gets washed away! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are fine!! Never feel like you have to comment on any of my post, I just enjoy visiting with you and I love that we can encourage one another even if it doesn’t apply to whatever we’ve blogged about!! I thought your blog on pride was great but of course Satan has to attack wherever he can…thankfully we have a God who is stronger and able!! I definitely agree our animals (cats or dogs) are capable of picking up on our feelings..Eli (my dog) is always quick to comfort and snuggle me when he knows I’m sad..Even though he’s a nervous wreck and shaking all the while LOL, he means well and he makes me smile regardless.
      God knew we humans needed these fur balls!!


  4. Amen wonderful post!
    I love Yorkie’s they are so cute..
    Have you asked your Vet about fish oil to help control your pets seizures?
    It has been studied and shown to help treat seizures in dogs..and humans. A fish oil that contains DHA and Omega 3..
    A good brand certified to be free of mercury.. Please ask your Vet if your interested.
    I pray your pets are better real soon!
    God Bless 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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